I can’t move past it.
I know the rest of us have moved on. But, I’m still thinking about the Oscars when Will Smith stood up and slapped Chris Rock for comparing Jada Pinkett with Demi Moore in GI Jane.
And, that wasn’t even the weirdest thing that happened.
I guess this incident became – as so many of our pop culture moments do – an emotional and cultural Rorschach test. It became a marker of how we view life, gender roles, violence and righteous indignation.
One peculiar thing happened in the court of public opinion. There was a group of strong-minded people who vehemently praised Will for “defending his wife.”
From where I sat, I saw a troubled man lose control and lash out. I saw a huge, both in stature and superstardom, man assault another man who probably weighs 140 pounds soaking wet. I saw two guys who had been abuse victims in their childhood revert, I’m guessing in my armchair analyst style, to childhood reactions. One gave vent to his rage, the other remained calm, handling the assault with a quip and subverted emotions.
Another troubling reaction that made the social media rounds was the antipathy toward Will’s wife. She rolled her eyes and, for some, that was as good as standing up and requesting that her husband don a gladiator helmet and charge the stage.
There were a host of folks who believed that Will Smith should never work again. There was talk about how it was mishandled by the director of the Oscars. I mean, a guy stormed the stage, smacked another dude, and the show went on. The smacker was surrounded by supporters as tears streamed down his face; he was honored with an award; and, wait for it, he received a standing ovation.
Sigh.
So, what have we learned?
Well, my take-away is that we still need to talk about righteous anger, our American adoration of violence as a solution (think everything from Dirty Harry to The Equalizer and John Wick), and our understanding of men and women. Did Jada really need defending in that manner and from that insult?
I’ve been insulted and if I was at a work event and someone landed a verbal sucker punch (which has happened, by the way), I would be furious if my husband’s reaction was to slap the insulter. Dude.
What do I think should have happened? Chris Rock tells a joke, Jada Pinkett rolls her eyes, Quest Love gets his award.
But, what did happen opens the doors for so many fascinating discussions.
And, guess what. I think I’m going to open the door to a discussion about this on my SolFul Connections podcast!